Tough love: Does it make me mean?

I love my best friend, like... to fucking death, I would give the world to her if I could, she is everything to me. Having said that, it is pretty much common sense, that I would walk on broken glass to ensure her happiness, right? Right.

So why is it I have been walking on fucking egg shells to not hurt her feelings? Because everybody else fucking does. 

She is between 5 foot 4 inches and 5 foot 5 inches and probably weighs between 72 and 77 KG (160-170 pounds) so yes, she is on the heavier side.

I always hear her complain about feeling self conscious, she hates trying on clothes, she wants a boy friend ("that is not fat and ugly"), how she hates how she looks, she is embarrassed by how big her thighs and stomach are, she wants to be able to wear a bikini, blah blah blah. 

Always fucking complaining, never doing anything about it. I ALWAYS try my best to help her, always, always, always and I give her healthy diet tips and healthy workouts to do and give her a healthy set amount of calories to eat (1200-1500) but she always messes up on day 1 and then gives up completely.

I told her she had an eating disorder (binge eating disorder) because she eats when she is not even hungry, she enjoys food in a way that is not healthy (it brings comfort). I did not say this to be mean, I was simply stating a fact. She can't diet, she does not workout, she does not fucking try and I am sick of it and now she is mad at me because I told her not to complain to me anymore because I have tried to help and you don't listen so I don't care anymore. 

I don't personally think I am in the wrong here, I want us to both be in shape and happy by this Thanksgiving (that is if she visits, she lives out of state) but I know she won't be because she doesn't try and no one tells her like it is. I know if I am skinny and happy by then and she isn't she will be extremely jealous and upset as being "chubby" and "loving to eat" (really it is just easier to convince myself to binge when someone else does it with you) was always our biggest "in common" traits.