A Tee-shirt away from ripping my bloody face off

I do so love my sister, she suffered from Anorexia at my age you see and since I couldn't go to church with her she wanted to make it up by taking me to lunch (which I said yes but didn't plan on eating) luckily she did not have any money and suggested going for a walk at the park around the track as it is such a nice day out. A much better idea and more fun than eating. So off I go to go walking, hopefully it will rid me of my stress and take my mind off the hunger pains.

I can't even look in the mirror; I just want it off, I want it all fucking off

I was going to go to church and was putting my skinnies on and a tee-shirt and I saw my muffin top

bloody fucking hell 

I am so sick of myself I looked in the mirror for two seconds and fell apart, I can't stand it anymore, I want it all off it isn't fair, I want it all off

I am not leaving this god forsaken room until I get to the 120s 

I don't fucking care if my parents take everything away or threaten me with punishments I can't do this anymore